When I think of the value of coaching, which is really the same thing as asking, “Why coaching”? I think of the letter “Y”.
I like to imagine that if this letter were a path, then you might want your journey on this path to start at the top left and travel downstream. Things might start off in a diagonal downward direction, but you wouldn’t know any better. You would just follow the path, past the point where the diagonal line becomes a straight one, and the way to go would always seem easy to see because it would be ALL you would see.
Things would be the same if you started at the top right, too.
In each case, whether you started on the left or the right, you’d be traveling downstream, too, with the wind at your back. Things would flow easily.
Sometimes, our lives are like this. The path is easy to follow. The direction is easy to see. Sometimes, we choose this easy path because we WANT to have no decision to make, because we want to just flow.
But if your path started at the bottom of the “Y”, things might get tricky, because at some point, you would HAVE to make a decision. The line might start along a straight path, just as the bottom of “Y” does, but eventually, your two options would look crooked. You could go back down the straight line, but if you wanted to go up, you’d have to make a bold decision.
Which way would you choose? Would you take a left or a right at the fork in the road, at the middle of the “Y”? If it was a particularly difficult decision to make, it might seem like the wind was blowing right in your face, so strong that you might not even see both possible paths in front of you.
This is where coaching comes in, and where I see its great value. It’s a fact that sometimes you just don’t know which way to go. You don’t know whether to take the left or the right. You might even consider staying in one place.
Even for those who can see both paths, you might say to yourself, “Too much rides on the decision”, “There’s too much at stake”, and “I’ll put it off.”
“Paralysis by analysis” might set. Fear might creep in. Maybe a feeling of being an imposter would emerge.
But if you’re the kind of person who starts at the bottom and wants to go up, then you need a coach.
While you’re at it, you might as well get a good coach, because a good coach helps you ask yourself the right questions that effectively move you beyond decision paralysis to a place of “resonant action”; that is, a path forward that resonates with you and your most important values, priorities, and dreams.
A good coach helps you see the possible paths ahead for what they are, and what they are not. A good coach helps you deal with the uncertainty that each possible path contains.
So that’s “Y” coaching, but why then, are there so many “Y nots” to coaching? Why doesn’t EVERYONE have a great coach?
I think the same barriers to action exist here, too. People say, “It’s too expensive”, “I’m not an executive”, “I’m not worth it”, “It’s not the right time.”
Like many decisions that can change your life, you waffle and make excuses.
Coaching is an investment, but I believe that everyone who really wants to grow should experience it and decide for themselves whether it is worth their time and money.
And yes, there are some not-so-great coaches who may themselves cloud your ability to see the paths that lay ahead you.
But if you’re “why” is to grow, to become unstuck, to become a better leader, worker, boss, provider, son, daughter, wife, husband, mother, father, grandparent, then shop around for the best coach you can afford.
Do sample sessions with coaches who do such sessions for free. Take a sneak peak at what lies beyond the middle of the “Y”, where the path might turn diagonal, and things might get crooked.
And when you find the coach with whom you work best, you’ll know because they’ll never leave you by the side of the road, which ever fork in it you decide to take.
